the curtain rises
the dream is over
and i open my eyes
to the sun
its depressing
so i close my eyes again
try to find my place
but the play is over
and the actors have exited
stage right
it’s useless
like trying to fix your hair
in a mirror
at midnight
it doesn’t matter now
the sun is clawing my eyes out
i pull back the sheets
to reveal what i am
its depressing
i count my ribs
and i climb out of bed
towards the sun
-JD
am i going mad
is it death
i seek
is it moonlight
through my doorframe
am i blind
or just
guilty
or unwavering
blink of an eye
where i shroud myself
in holy ales
ails
and i am gone
the soul is a ghost that haunts me
walk through the mist
i am afloat
the river
calls
my
name
-JD
i left my hope
at the bottom of the well
where i was born
it returned to me this autumn
while i was drunk
and bored
and i saw my future swallowed
as i looked out the window
knowing fully well that my life
has been me
lying on my back
on one long train ride
with nothing but the sky
and my endless blues
-JD
does your heart break
aphrodite
when you see that I suffer
do you know longing
do you feel the pain of hunger beating in your chest
like the mad drums of native lands
do you stare out of windows at the midday sun
and see nothing but the future
blue and dark and frozen
does it make your teeth chatter
aphrodite
do you spend your summers
shivering alone
up on your mountaintop
where you tip your amphora
to fill the stemmed glasses of lovers
with lust
and passion
up on your mountaintop
where you watch the seasons change
with immortal indifference
are you sad when the leaves fall
aphrodite
when the trees are as bare
as my human soul
do you weep for me
aphrodite
in my bed at night
where you chose to leave me
to deny me a drop
to leave my chalice empty
does your heart break
aphrodite
or are you too high
too care?
-JD
when we laughed we laughed with faded tongues
our eyes darted around the room
with a radiant roar
a motor bike dashing across the desert
behind the closed lips of secretive smiles
there were fingers snaking into skirts
behind closed doors
there were apples being eaten
sacrifices being made
stones being etched
behind closed eyelids
there was the mornings shame
hiding in dark corners
amongst the worst of forgotten nightmares
a motorbike heading straight towards the mouth of a canyon
our minds left open for the room to see
where we will end up
at the end of the night
how we will feel tomorrow we worry not
if that bridge is to be burned
it must first be crossed
a motorbike flying through the night air
there will be a day
when all the empty cans remind us of our empty hearts
when all the plans we made
float away in the smoke
out the window
towards the east and the sunrise
and the cold waves of the atlantic
when all the laughs we shared
the tears we cried on each others shoulders
the drugs we smoked
and huffed
and drank
and swallowed
and shot in our arms
and blew up our noses
when all the dreams we shaked
the fluids we shared
the tunes we hummed
the beds we made
the promises we broke
will just be the pieces of an old motorbike
floating down the colorado river
-JD
when do the shells stop
when will the rain come
im tired
but the sun keeps shining
and strangers keep smiling
with their perfectly
straight
white
teeth
there was an old john prine song
stuck in my head
about an old army veteran
who couldnt live
without a
needle
stuck
in his arm
which was better
than most things
stuck in my head
people worry alot
about what im thinking
they say they
cant read
me
i am not a novel
or a coupon
or a newspaper article
i can hardly
keep up with
the current
events
i am not a poem
nor am i
much
of a poet
the truth is
im not really sure
what
im thinking
most of the time
which is why
i write
most of it
down
and its usually about women
i lost
or future drinks
or drinks
i have already consumed
sometimes its about
old songs
i get stuck
in my head
sometimes
its about death
sometimes its about
lonliness
sadness
the end of the world
sometimes
its about nothing
at all
but it is always
what im thinking
so
if you are worried
that you
can not read
me
at least i gave you
this
-JD
